Skip to content
  • Home
  • About us
  • All Greeting Cards
    • Anniversary
    • Apology
    • Birthday's
      • Birthday
      • Belated Birthday
      • Husband's Birthday
      • Grandma's Birthday
      • Wife Birthday
    • Blank Card
    • Christmas
    • Congrats on being Single Again
    • Encouragement
    • Father's Day
    • Female Friendship
    • Get Well
    • Graduation
    • Mother's Day
    • New Baby
    • New Job
    • Party Invitation
    • Promotion
    • Retirement
    • Thank You
    • Valentine's Day
    • Wedding Invite & Thank You
  • Gift Bags
  • Contact
Log in
  • Pinterest
  • Instagram
Toestown Direct
  • Home
  • About us
  • All Greeting Cards
    • Anniversary
    • Apology
    • Birthday's
      • Birthday
      • Belated Birthday
      • Husband's Birthday
      • Grandma's Birthday
      • Wife Birthday
    • Blank Card
    • Christmas
    • Congrats on being Single Again
    • Encouragement
    • Father's Day
    • Female Friendship
    • Get Well
    • Graduation
    • Mother's Day
    • New Baby
    • New Job
    • Party Invitation
    • Promotion
    • Retirement
    • Thank You
    • Valentine's Day
    • Wedding Invite & Thank You
  • Gift Bags
  • Contact
Log in Cart

Item added to your cart

View cart

Filter:

Availability
0 selected Reset
Availability
Price
The highest price is $19.99 Reset
$
$
Remove all

92 products

Filter and sort Filter

Filter and sort

Filter

92 products

Availability
Clear
Price

The highest price is $19.99

$
$
Clear
Remove all
Remove all

92 products

  • Greeting Card - One Nightstand

    Greeting Card - One Nightstand

    Greeting Card - One Nightstand

    Regular price $5.99
    Regular price Sale price $5.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • After floating around for fourty days on Noah's ark, Noah, Noah's wife and their two sons are standing outside on the deck of the ark under clear skies. On the wall behind Noah's sons are framed pictures of very strange looking animals. These animals are unlike anything we have ever seen. The name of the animals are written under the image of each animal. The name of the first animal is a Gnorf, it looks like a mouse but with six arms and large tusks. There is a large red X painted over the picture.

    Greeting Card - No More Gnorfs

    Greeting Card - No More Gnorfs

    Regular price $5.99
    Regular price Sale price $5.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • Two couples enjoy a cocktail at the stern on the upper deck of a large cruise ship under a banner that says "Welcome Aboard Meet and Greet". One of the gentleman in conversation with the other couple says "Yea, I'm pretty nocturnal, always pushing the envelope". The lady with other couple clearly impressed says "Oh my, how exciting! Are you some kind of daredevil?" The wife of the gentleman that made the original comment says with a bit of a frown "Hardly, he works the night shift at the post office!"

    Greeting Card - Pushing The Envelope

    Greeting Card - Pushing The Envelope

    Regular price $5.99
    Regular price Sale price $5.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • Bat S--T Crazy Greeting Card

    Bat S--T Crazy Greeting Card

    Bat S--T Crazy Greeting Card

    Regular price $5.99
    Regular price Sale price $5.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • Sea Enema Greeting Card

    Sea Enema Greeting Card

    Sea Enema Greeting Card

    Regular price $5.99
    Regular price Sale price $5.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • Crack Of Don Greeting Card

    Crack Of Don Greeting Card

    Crack Of Don Greeting Card

    Regular price $5.99
    Regular price Sale price $5.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • Protruding Manholes Greeting Card

    Protruding Manholes Greeting Card

    Protruding Manholes Greeting Card

    Regular price $5.99
    Regular price Sale price $5.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • At a large wedding reception in a banquet hall hangs a banner that says "Welcome Mr. and Mrs. Screwcork". Attendinding the wedding are a mixture of wine bottle screw caps and wine corks. There is a massive brawl going on between the screwcaps and the corks. Well dressed corks both male and female are pouring wine over the heads of the screw caps while the screw caps swear at, and physically attack the corks. It is total bedlam; however in the forground the beautifuly dressed bride and groom are alone

    Greeting Card - The Screwcorks

    Greeting Card - The Screwcorks

    Regular price $5.99
    Regular price Sale price $5.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • Inside the cozy kitchen of an older couple we find a large kitchen knife, a mixture of carrots, onions and tomatoes lying on a cutting board ready to be used in a stew. An older gentleman stands off to the side holding an old fashioned trumpet style hearing aid up to his ear. A hobo with a scarf, winter hat, wearing torn, patched, dirty ratty clothes has his arm extended with his index finger pointing directly at a lady making dinner. Christmas, birthday, celebrations greeting cards and Gift bags

    Gift Bag - Rude Beggar

    Gift Bag - Rude Beggar

    Regular price From $3.99
    Regular price Sale price From $3.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • At a party in an elegant ballroom adorned with beautiful chandeliers a nicly dressed lady holding a tray of appetizers walks up to a lady skeleton wearing a fashionable hat, necklace and purse holding a glass of champagne in her hand. The skeleton says "Oh no Phyllis I can't have bean dip it just goes right though me".The funny "Bean Dip" comic is a favorite in the Toe's Town wine and gift bag collection especially for those with irritable bowel syndrome or other stomach sensitivities.

    Gift Bag - Bean Dip

    Gift Bag - Bean Dip

    Regular price From $3.99
    Regular price Sale price From $3.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • A walrus and two teen beavers sit in an orthodontist's waiting room with their front teeth and braces on full display. The coffee table has two magazines lying on top, one called Cosmobeaverton and the other Walrus Quarterly. A picture on the wall shows a before picture of a beaver with no visible front teeth and an after picture of a beaver with two teeth sitting proud of the beavers lips. In the next room the walrus orthodontist is looking intently at an xray of a young beaver who's teeth are not sticking

    Gift Bag - Long in the Tooth

    Gift Bag - Long in the Tooth

    Regular price From $3.99
    Regular price Sale price From $3.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • Professional Underware Model Gift Bag

    Professional Underware Model Gift Bag

    Professional Underware Model Gift Bag

    Regular price From $3.99
    Regular price Sale price From $3.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • At the arrivals section of an airport a gentleman is crouched down while standing on his suitcase with his pants down around his ankles. He has his bum a few inches away from a customs arrival retinal scanner. The gentleman's wife is standing beside him with a look of disbelief on her face as she says " Larry, I'm pretty sure it's a retia scanner".

    Gift Bag - Retina Scanner

    Gift Bag - Retina Scanner

    Regular price From $3.99
    Regular price Sale price From $3.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • A prostitute in a tight fitting dress is standing on a sidwalk under a streetlight in the bad part of town. There is a tatoo parlor and a bail bondsman shop in the background. A pea pod wearing naval uniform is standing beside the lady looking intently at her. The lady says, "I would love to honey but I'm allergic to pea nuts".

    Gift Bag - Pea Nuts

    Gift Bag - Pea Nuts

    Regular price From $3.99
    Regular price Sale price From $3.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • Soaring above the cloud dotted sky at 10,000 feet is a flock of geese. A younger goose looks over his sholder and says "I gotta go dad". The father goose looking bothered says, 'arrrg, why diddn't you go while we were resting in the field a few minutes ago? Hurry up and just go behind one of those clouds over there".

    Gift Bag - 10,000 Foot Bio Break

    Gift Bag - 10,000 Foot Bio Break

    Regular price From $3.99
    Regular price Sale price From $3.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • A beautiful clear day on the second green at golf course where a urinal and a toilet are having a heated conversation. John, the toilet is donning a retro style golf hat knickers and is waiving his hands and golf club in the air. The toilet seat acting as his top lip he is clearly making a fuss as expletives symbols representing swear words come from his mouth. His golf partner Uri the urinal wearing retro golf attire with a p-trap for one leg waiving his putter and is shouts back to John and says

    Gift Bag - Potty Mouth

    Gift Bag - Potty Mouth

    Regular price From $3.99
    Regular price Sale price From $3.99
    Unit price /  per 
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • 6

Quick links

  • About us,
  • Collections
  • Contact
  • Refund Policy
  • Privacy Policy
  • Shipping Policy
  • Terms of Service
  • Do not sell or share my personal information

Info

  • About us,
  • Collections
  • Contact
  • Refund Policy
  • Privacy Policy
  • Shipping Policy
  • Terms of Service
  • Do not sell or share my personal information

A message from Toe:

Everyone has specific family members, friends, or associates that do and say the strangest of things. It is my belief that you could substitute any one of the people in your circle of influence with characters from Toe’s Town. That’s what makes Toe’s Town cards fun. Enjoy!

  • Instagram
  • Pinterest

Country/region

  • CAD $ | Canada
  • USD $ | United States
Payment methods
  • PayPal
© 2025, Toestown Direct
  • Choosing a selection results in a full page refresh.
  • Opens in a new window.